Thursday, February 21, 2008

finishing the rambleings

so the last post was almost finished i have a few more things i put down on the old note book...

we try so hard 2 be normal/different/not weird/unique/accepted/ and whatever else I forgot... we look for a systematic,scientific, contradictory, philosophy of life (my grammar will be extra hideous today sorry) that fits in with our desires and motivations. we go along constantly tweaking standards and ways of thinking, temperaments, and other things of that nature, in order to be more homogeneous to ourselves and others... (not sure if this makes sens as i rewrite it) God takes care of all of it [we can identify completely and loose ourselves in him... and then find ourselves again :O) ]...i know it sounds like a cop out to some people but its acom's razor. life was and is so simple before we over complicate it with disobedience and separation from/to God. I'm not saying its easy to walk completely in accordance with his will (it should be...but we muck it all up). i am saying we don't have to have the answers/rely on ourselves/be right/wrong. we just enjoy life celebrate God and just do what he says and we can be happy never "getting there" we can enjoy being "not finished" or "finished" just love God with all our might!

while i was still at the bar a few weeks ago..."hhmmm... to those who know) i'm in a bar again.. not getting drunk... not worried or nervous about being here.... it's a brand new experience... actively praying for people around me and n0t "scared" of alcohol or people or "what might happen". I know i wont fall back into my old ways.

hhhm squared....the slow pour still escapes America (lol)we need more Gueness taps and spoons.

my heart sometimes feels like a dark place that craves God's light... sometimes it feels like it is slipping through my fingers like water cupped in my hand.

i wish I could have some great epiphany (3 amigos/hook movies) and have an impact on the world... am I destined to mediocrity? am I ok with that? am i ok with it if that is what God wants? <- really? LOL

the indifference of

put a face on and get paid?

so that was probably a little more random than the last one but i will keep up the word jumbo as long as it keeps getting read.

by the way let me tell you how much i don't like not talking to christina. its not that bad of a feeling until isit and think about it... hey i can;t call her if i want to or if i have something i want to tell her... :O( i am glad she is where she is thought... untill her angelic voice meets my anguished ears again... i will distract myself with good food, good friends, studying, and disk golf... what a life!


Simon said...

I'm still reading this stuff. I like people who think a lot, and I like hearing their thoughts. You think a lot.

As far as God calling you to mediocrity... I'm not sure what to think. I think I chafe against mediocrity just like you do, and I don't like to think that God might call us to that. I guess I'm of the opinion that there's no place for lukewarm or just "regular" people in God's kingdom. I don't think that means you have to conquer the world like Alexander the Great or anything, or even have a "successful" life as the world measures it. I think we need to go by a different standard to tell wether we're mediocre or not. I'm still not quite sure where my brain is going with these thoughts, but I think as long as we continue to follow God with every decision in life, we're won't end up mediocre.

Don't back down from challenges in life, or from the chance to excel as the world measures it. But also, if God wants you somewhere that can seem boring, it's His call. Living for God always brings new challenges no matter how the world measures it.

So there are is a little of my brain.

Chachinator said...

I feel like mediocrity is like coffee that has been sitting in the pot for about 45 minutes without any heat on it. It's just kind of "meh"--or gross if you ask me.

I think mediocrity has somewhat of a negative connotation to it, and I agree with Simon in that I can't see God being content with us as Christ Followers never growing or whatever mediocrity means. However. I don't think that means that we all have to have our faith so fired up and hot and heavy that we stand on every street corner in whatever-city on our soap box proclaiming that everone's going to hell: that's just not our niche. Some of us are good at being "ordinary" people, and that's how we get the gospel across.

SO it's definitely possible to spiritually extraordinary, but a "normal" person.